Monday, October 20, 2008

More ramblings, angst, and excuses

I made a little more progress over the weekend on Accomplice, but I think I'll end up cutting about half of it. Blech, I'm getting stalled out on it. Not sure I'm stuck, but I think I have to back-track on a few scenes to get my people into the right places. I guess I could go all NaNo on it and just introduce the next scene with a paragraph describing what should have happened to get them here, and then move forward. And fix it later. I might do that. I requested a couple of research books from the library. Not sure I'm willing to admit the subject just yet. I don't know if I'm irrationally afraid that someone would "steal my idea", or just that everyone would laugh. Or tell me that I can't/shouldn't do it.

In the mean time, I'm stressing over time to get other things done. This week, we have evening activities every day but Friday. Thursday is a daycare field trip to the pumpkin patch, which I'm helping to chaperone. And since it's my "day off", I'll probably end up going home with the kids instead of leaving them there so I could get work done (or at least get my oil changed). Saturday my daughter is attending a Fancy Nancy "soiree" at the library, and we have a Halloween party that evening. Oh yeah, and my husband and I don't have costumes yet. Sunday after church we have some sort of Thomas the Train event that my mother-in-law found. Next week is more of the same, plus we're double-booked on Thursday night (daycare hosts their Halloween party in the evening, which annoys the baloney out of me), Friday is Halloween, and Saturday is another party.

And, coming back to the subject of NaNo (I'm actually thinking chronoligically, not just skipping from topic to topic...really), I'm still wavering on whether or not to try it again. Time is worrying me. I don't want to use Accomplice because I think I'm too far in to just power out 50,000 words (I'll want to edit too much). And because the "rules" say you have to start fresh, not use a work-in-progress. Having two works-in-progress worries me. I'm prone to starting projects and not finishing them, and I really don't want to do that here.

I have an idea for a paranormal/urban fantasy, and (with or without conscious permission), my subconscious brain is working through character sketches. I don't know how well this would work, but my hero is going to be a nurse. Yes, a nurse. A male one. Talk about non-alpha male :) And I think that he'll have a bit of a chip on his shoulder about it too. Although its the best career for him, and though nurses are pretty well-educated and well-paid these days, and there are more and more male nurses, people (especially his guy friends) still give him shit. Maybe some of his previous girlfriends have too (which might be why he's unattached). The heroine won't quite understand the issue, though. That will count in her favor, some of the time. He doesn't have a name yet (I may have to go back through my last name-storming post...there were some good suggestions in there).

I just don't know. Am I up for sleep deprivation? Writing from about 9-11+ every night is my best(only) bet for winning. That also means no yoga or pilates DVD workouts before bed (I'm not giving up my weekly exercise class, but that's only one day a week...).

Last year I had a nursing infant who didn't sleep through the night. I'm accostomed to sleep now. Last year I worked 3 days a week, and could count on 2 weekday naptimes for bonus writing time. This year I'm lucky to get one day a week home with the kids, and only one of the two still naps.

Last year this was brand new. NaNo was a lark. I didn't admit to even my husband that I was doing it for nearly 2 weeks. This year, I think I have decent writing skills, and am on the verge of actively seeking publication, am a publicly admitted member of RWA. Failure would be so much more disappointing. Success would have so much less novelty.

I need chocolate!


Robin said...

Sending virtual chocolate...

Have fun with all your Halloween festivities! It's my favorite holiday!

I was gung ho on doing NaNo again this year, but now I'm not sure. I haven't signed up yet, and things are a little busier than I'd like so I'm not sure I can devote enough time to it either. Although I do have a new story I want to write - my first YA - and I thought how awesome it would be to get it almost done in one month! We'll see. Keep us posted on what you decide!

Amanda said...

Hey maybe I can get a weekend in November free to go up to the cabin in the woods with the group of us writers. Won't that tork off your husband. ;) It might be an idea. I'm doing the double writing. I'm working on Forsaken and there's this idea that seems to be totally original that I'm looking to do. Either that or the Desire I outlined in a class.